Friday, June 6, 2008

Stories From The Bus

This week, on LA's Metro:

Story #1: An elderly woman sits in the aisle seat with a 20-something woman sitting in the window seat. The older is searching through her bag, as though she's looking for something to do more than a specific item. Ah, she decides on an activity, it's time to retire the teeth for the evening. To the likely horror of the stranger seated on her left, she proceeds to extract her dentures, carefully wipe them off and put them into a box. She continued to rifle through her bag and pulled out a pair of latex gloves. I got nervous but thankfully, she was just moving them to a new location in her bag.

Story #2: A gray-haired man, looks to be in his early 60s, stands up from his seated position for seemingly no reason. He chooses to stand for quite some time at the front of the bus. He's not talking to the driver as some do but just standing there, occasionally, looking back at the rest of the passengers. After a few miles, he realizes he needs to adjust his undergarments and right then, takes his time dealing with his apparent wedgie...in front of the entire bus! Amazingly, no one said a thing but many chose that moment to look out the window and enjoy LA's scenery, which happened to be a gas station and a highway. He got off at the next stop and finished the job he started on the bus, that's right, he picked another wedgie as we drove on by!

For those wondering, according to dictionary.com, the definition of wedgie is:
"Informal. The condition of having one's underpants or other clothing uncomfortably stuck between the buttocks."

Thank you, LA Metro passengers, for entertaining me on a fairly regular basis.

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